What You Have To Look Out For When Thinking About Marriage.
Ah Marriage, the relationship that is a vow between a Man and Woman
Another wonderful message given by our very own Dr. Pauline Walley-Daniels took place on Sunday August 12, 2012. She continued from Saturday August 11, 2012 message, and she really took the church on a level that the youth were surprised to be on. As a youth myself, I never would have expected the Head of the Church to speak so outright- but she was positive with her approach. I have known Dr. Pauline for practically all my life, and I can definetly say that from this message and her new books Progressive Solution Prayers for Fruitfulness and Fulfillment and Destiny Solution Prayers: Lord, Make me Over, that Dr. Pauline will defiantly be my marriage counselor. That is not only because she is my Pastor, but because I feel in my heart that she knows what she is talking about. I mean she gives you real situations all throughout her messages. She uses herself as an example a lot just to prove that she has been through things and is standing here today to tell the tales.
Now to start this off, “Just like each country has it’s own way of making their own rice, each couple have their own special way of choosing their partners.” So that means when your friends or family members were able to marry their high school or college sweetheart or find their partner in a shopping mall, does not mean that you will have the same fate. The reason is that your partner may show up in a more romantic way or they even may be your best friend and you will not even know it until you hit that part of your life where your thoughts go to your future concerning marriage.
But here’s the thing you must remember is that when you are looking to get married, do not just pay attention to your Spouse but pay attention to their family too, because when the devil tries to cause havoc in your marriage you would not just want your family at your back but also your Spouse’s. But apart from paying attention you have to take notes to see what type of family does your future Spouse have. Do their parents not believe in marriage, but believe that people who love each other should just live together? Do your soon-to-be mother in law say little snide comments about your behavior or appearance? Does your Fiance act different when their family is around? And the list goes on, but it’s up to you to iron out all these problems before you get married to your Fiance or it will turn into a curse upon your marriage.
If I have not said it before I am saying it now, know what you are getting into because when you get married, the word “in-law” means that by legal right you have been adopted into their family. So that means you have to get to know your partner’s family before making that Big Step. So you have to make sure that your partner’s family loves you for you and is kind to you-to your face and behind your back. I mean I would not want someone to show me fake smiles and then plot my demise behind my back. You have to be prepared when you are thinking about marriage, prepared for the ups and downs. I mean married life seems fun but, what is your root? What is the foundation of your marriage? Is it God- who will help you and carry you on when you are experiencing those down points in your marriage? Or the Devil-who will want something in return for his help?
Like I wrote in the last blog, when you are dating deliberately offend your partner. The reason is because it is better to know the person you might marry before you wake up on morning during your marriage and ask yourself “Was he/she this way before I married him/her? Was he/she always this uptight or stubborn? Was he/she always this lazy or spoiled?” So before making that vow and professing your love to one another, ask yourself: Who am I getting married to? Are you getting married to someone who is like a friend and a Spouse to you? I mean I would like that, because then if we are best friends we can be honest to each other. He can tell me that the dress I have on reveals way too much and I need to cover up; or it can be the other way and I am telling him that he needs to loosen up and shake what his mama gave him. And then comes the nicknames that couples who are still in the Honeymoon phase 50 years later in their marriage.
I mean I would love to have that kind of relationship with my future Husband and his family, because then I would not have to worry about being hurt. Because your Spouse should be able to protect you and defend you. I mean everyone has those friends who, even if you were in jail, they would say “What oh no she/he was with me and we were shooting hoops/challenging each other in Dance Revolution on my Xbox.” That is the type of friend everyone should have, not the whole lying to save each other’s backs but the protector and defender part.
This message was based on Ruth chapter 1 verses 1-22, and the words that were the reason behind you having to not only pay attention to your Spouse but also to their family is verses 16 – 17:
16 And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
17 Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.
This message was also based on Malachi 2:14, and the part where it speaks about friendship, which can be companionship because your Spouse should always be your Right Hand in every important decision making part of your life. Malachi 2:14;
14 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the Lord hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.
And one last thing: Do not jump into a relationship and let your partner disrespect you, because you are God’s child and his children deserve better.